My man is a mean man
by me.fergie
Summary: SongFic to Stefanie Heinzmann's "My man is a mean man". CaKe. Calleigh tells you the truth about her and Jake.


This is my first attempt on someone else than Ryan Wolfe. And of course, I go for Jake :) He's hot, isn't he. Anyways. This is a song fic. The song is "My man is a mean man" by Swiss singer Stefanie Heinzmann. I don't know if any of the people outside the German speaking countries know her, but I heard that there in fact exists an original version of this song, I just don't know by whom, so if anyone could tell me, I'd appreciate. I hope nevert**heless you like it, even if you don't know the song....**

**Disclaimer: I don't own CSI Miami, Calleigh or Jake. I don't own Stefanie Heinzmann or the song "My man is a mean man". I just borrow it for your entertainment.**

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My man is a mean man**

**Na na nan na  
na na nan na**

My name is Calleigh Duquesne. I think you know me by now. I'm the girl, or rather woman, who seems to have a tendency to fall for the wrong guys. I don't know if some of you still remember John Hagen? Yeah, that was a wrong guy. Wanting to be the hero and therefore almost screwing up a case. Well, it doesn't matter. It was a long time ago. Now, I'm in love again. The only problem is…. Well, I'm gonna tell you about him. I'll tell you all about me and Jake. And…

**I swear to tell the truth  
and nothin****g but the truth  
loving him ain't easy  
he's bad bad news **

Oh, yeah, he's really bad news. That's maybe because he's every girl's dream. A bad boy with a smile that almost outshines the sun. A Prince Charming on a Harley. I mean, it's not like I'm completely love blind. You only have to look at him to see how bad he is. But then again, it's just sooo… Oh I don't know. I always had a fancy for him. And while it isn't easy to love him, just because you never know what he's up to in the next five seconds, it was so easy to fall in love with him….

**M****ama say "Use your head  
you don't need him  
look at all the shit he pulls you through"  
Papa curse "Baby girl if you don't leave him  
there's nothing I can do for you  
there's nothing I can do"**

I met him a long time ago. Back when I still had a lot of contact with my family. We were in Police Academy together. Already back then, he completely had me. I'm not the girl who falls for a guy easily. But hell, if you see Jake Berkeley, you can't do anything but immediately falling for him. My parents never liked him. Of course, they never met him, but I wrote them about him. Mama would have understood me if she'd met him. He didn't literally pulled through all the shit she thinks, but I sure often felt bad because of him. Because I couldn't keep him close. He was always… gone. And Daddy? Hell, when he found out what kind of guy his lamb chop was dating, he only shook his head. "Such an intelligent girl", he said, "and such a man with her." But I told them both off.

**H****e's a mean man but it's my man  
my man alone  
he's a mean mean one  
a son of a gun  
he keeps me by the telephone  
he's a mean man, my man, my man alone**

**Na na nan na **_**(he's my man)**_**  
na na nan na **_**(my mean man)**_**  
na na nan na**

My mean man. Jake Berkeley. He's gorgeous. This wonderful hair. Those shiny eyes… He's really attractive. He has this scar in his face. I mean, other girls would say it's not really attractive. Maybe even repulsive, because it's next to his lips, and most girls want the perfect mouth to kiss. I think the scar is what really makes me want to kiss him. It gives his whole appearance some kind of a bad boy touch. A hint of dangerousness. A certain depth. So much strength. It makes you wonder what happened to him. Has he been in a fight? Maybe for another girl? I know how the scar happened. But I won't tell you. You can fantasize about it. I mean, it is sexy after all…. But I'm drifting off…

**H****e likes to mess around  
he's always in the mess  
likes to have a drink or two  
before he does the rest  
knock knock six o'clock in the morning  
Baby I´ll be missing you  
he comes and goes without warning  
doing what he do…. hmm  
doing what he do**

Of course, all this really doesn't sound like the guy you wanna be dating. You just cannot really depend on him, because he's such a mess. You never know what he'll do in the next couple of seconds. You never know where he is right now. While I'm telling you my story, he could be outside, waiting in front of my house. He could also be in some bar and down a few beers. He could be chasing bad guys around the city. He could do anything. He could be anywhere. He's like a ghost you cannot catch. Like air. It drives me crazy sometimes, when I don't hear anything from him for weeks, and suddenly in the middle of the night he calls and says "C'mon, I miss you, open the door, I want in." And then, you want to meet him, you make plans in advance, and he calls five minutes before you're supposed to meet and says, "Sorry, Cal, not today." I mean, that's not really what I expected from a relationship when I was young. But it is what you can expect from Jake. What you have to expect from him.

**H****e lies and he cheats  
he loves and he leaves  
that's just the way it goes  
but I do what I can  
I stand by my man  
I think he loves me  
I think he knows  
I think he knows**

Oh well, he doesn't really cheat. I mean, he's an undercover agent. He sure has to... you know… do some things he doesn't really want. Like with other girls. And lying? Well, it comes with the job. But of course, it isn't easy for me. It's not like I like being loved and then left, and then loved again, and left again. But I guess I have to get used to it. I mean, it's Jake Berkeley after all. You just don't catch Jake Berkeley. And really, isn't that what we all like about him? A smooth operator… I know he's bad for me. I know I could have a guy that hands me the world on a silver platter. Like Eric. But then again…. Would you trade? I want Jake. And as long as I can handle it, I'll stand by him. Doesn't matter what Eric says. He doesn't know what it's like. Jake and I are like Bonnie and Clyde. And Bonnie stood by Clyde. That's what I do, too. I stand by Jake.

I gotta go. He's calling. And it really is 6 A.M. Thank you for listening.

**N****a na nan na  
na na nan na**

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**Okay, so, tell me, did you like it? It's hard to write about someone else than Ryan. But well. Jake deserves having a fic dedicated to him, I think :)  
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